


A Jar full of Teeth

by LadyAhiru



Series: A Jar full of Love [1]
Category: Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski
Genre: All The Tropes, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blow Jobs, Elf!Jaskier, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eskel has reading glasses, Eventual Smut, Falling In Love, First Meetings, Fluff and Angst, Forehead Kisses, Getting to Know Each Other, Hand Jobs, Jaskier has Abandonment Issues, Jaskier is a power bottom, Jaskier is sad but he gets better, Justice for Buff Jaskier, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Massages, Praise Kink, Romance, Self-Esteem Issues, Slow Burn, So much flirting, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED, The boys are not used to basic kidness, Topping from the Bottom, Touch-Starved Eskel, meet cute, nobody is mortal on my watch, not betad we burn like Witchers, self doubt, slight Geralt bashing (Im sorry), so much soft, they both deserve nice things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-19
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:47:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 19,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24269203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyAhiru/pseuds/LadyAhiru
Summary: Jaskier was always quick to break promises he made to himself, which is why only three days after swearing to never smile at a Witcher ever again he befriends Eskel.
Relationships: Eskel/Jaskier | Dandelion
Series: A Jar full of Love [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1788628
Comments: 804
Kudos: 888
Collections: Jaskier or Geralt/others (with or w/out eachother)





	1. New Beginnings

**Author's Note:**

> So yeah...here I am...wrting another Rarepair...and no that doenst mean I dont ship Geraskier anymore. Just sometines you want strawberry ice cream even if you like chocolate the best.

* * *

He held his head up high all the way down the mountain. It was an issue of pride and now that Jaskier heart had been ripped in two it was the last thing he could hold onto to not just burst into tears and wallow in self-pity.

Twenty fucking years he had followed Geralt, had showered him in kindness and love and care only to have his feelings spat on, his friendship disregarded and thrown away.

He did not allow himself to let the growing sadness in his heart overcome his anger. He would show Geralt and the whole world that he could make it on his own. Success out of spite was his only goal now as he stomped down the stony path. His hands curled to fists he promised himself to never ever give his heart to a Witcher ever again.

He walked on for hours, until night fell, fueled by anger and frustration and only stopped when his knees finally gave in. Lucky enough he found himself near a small empty cave that would provide shelter for the night.

Jaskier made a small camp inside the cave, laying down and sighing heavily. The anger slowly subsided, replaced by overwhelming heartbreak and he curled up into a fetal position, silently sobbing. It was one thing for Geralt to not return his feelings, but another to not even call him a friend. He always knew that he cared more about the Witcher than the other way round, he wasn’t stupid but he had at least thought the other valued his friendship. 

Now all the memories of Geralt saying “I’m not your friend” came crashing back to him and he pressed his eyes shut, hoping to stop himself from crying even harder. He tried to count his breaths, to calm himself down. Crying would not help him, it would not change his situation and wouldn’t do him any good.

What he needed was a plan, to continue his life now. He had never been gladder to not be fully human. If he would have been he would have wasted almost half his life on an ungrateful asshole who didn’t know friendship if it would bite him in the ass. A sad laugh left his mouth when he thought about it, sure that Geralt hadn’t even known of his elven heritage and thought him completely human. Sure he wore a slight glamour, to round out his features and ears, but the Witcher never had any issue to see through such things when it concerned other people. He just never really looked at Jaskier.

The bard took a deep breath and rolled onto his back, trying to relax. He knew what he had to do. Make his way down the mountain, make sure to arrive at the camp at the foot of the mountain before Geralt pick up his belongings from Roach´s Saddle packs and never sing about a Witcher ever again.

Sleep came easier to him than he expected, his dreams thankfully empty of Geralt, instead he dreamt of summer rain on a field of flowers and a small animal bleating in the distance.

Jaskier woke up to the cheery song of birds, grunting and feeling a bit hungover without the pleasure of drinking the night before. He was only 120 but he suddenly felt too old for this shit. His joints cracked from a night on the hard stone ground and he stretched yawning. He quickly packed up his bedroll and continued his journey down.

Destiny seemed to favour him today because he indeed made it to the foot of the mountain before Geralt, slightly jogging up to Roach to pick up his belongings. With sadness in his eyes, he grabbed his lute and backpack and kissed the mare´s snout.

“Listen, girl, I’m not mad at you but it’s likely we won’t see each other again, ok?”

Roach gently nudged him with her nose, eyes focused on him and he smiled sadly. “Just, take care of the idiot for me ok?”

Making sure that he had gotten all of his things he turned around, sighed and walked off, ready to face whatever destiny would throw at him next.

He found himself in a surprisingly good mood, he had walked for days, without a certain place in mind and just enjoyed the warm summer sun on his skin. His heart might have been broken but it had also been set free and for the first time in twenty years there was no uncertainty, he now clearly knew where he stood with Geralt and even though I still hurt, would so for a while, it was peculiarly refreshing. No more “what ifs”, and even though he wasn’t over the rejection he now felt ready to look forward to where life would take him next.

It was slightly raining, but not heavily just a warm summer drizzle as he decided to take a small break. He made himself comfortable in a sea of wildflowers under a big tree that kept him dry and took his songbook out.

Jaskier had finished the song about Yennefer and Geralt but he wasn’t sure if he would actually sing it in public. It had been good to get the words out and onto paper but singing it would only pull onto the stitches of his barely mended heart.


	2. Lil´Bleater is the best Winggoat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jaskier meets Eskel and cries a lot....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey remember when I said earlier that I would update every few days....well that was clearly a lie...

Jaskier was writing in peace when he heard some happy-sounding bleating and small hooves quickly coming closer. Before he knew what was happening a small goat had made his way over to him and started munching on the sheet of paper in his hands.

Jaskier had no chance to react, too shocked and staring wide-eyed at the goat that had come out of nowhere when the little animal was gripped and pulled off him.

“Lil´ Beater no! We talked about this!” Jaskier raised his head and shielded his eyes from the sun that was brightly burning behind the large figure. He blinked a few times and was met with a shy smile and warm amber eyes.

Oh no, he thought and pressed his songbook against his chest, as if it would shield him from the unknown Witcher.

“I am so sorry. I hope she didn’t ruin your…paper?”

Jaskier blinked once more, suddenly finding himself unable to speak and just nodded in response.

The man kneeled down in front of him, giving him a better view of his face and Jaskiers mouth fell open at the beauty before him. He must even be broader then Geralt if the wide shoulders were any indication and Jaskier couldn’t help himself as he stared into the man’s warm eyes. Oh, what would he had given before to have Geralt look at him so softly.

The bard noticed an uneven scar, over the Witchers right cheek, and he had to stop himself to reach out and touch. The Witchers gaze turned frustrated and a little bit sad and he turned his face to hide his scars from Jaskiers view. The goat wriggled, unhappy to be held against the Witchers chest and tried to snap at Jaskiers paper again.

The bard laughed and quickly held it out of the way. “Yeah sorry, I didn’t expect to see a Witcher here…or to have my life’s work be devoured by a goat. Don’t you feed her enough…?”

“Eskel…I’m Eskel…and well I fed her plenty a few hours ago but the little menace is never full.”

“I see, well….” Jaskier started to shuffle through his satchel. “I think I still have an apple here somewhere? Is that okay if I feed her?”

Eskel´s face changed a little bit, showing surprise and a small smile at Jaskier´s request. The change in expression would be invisible to anyone who had not just spent twenty years learning how to read the stoic face of a Witcher.

“Yeah that’s okay, I´m going to set her down over here, ok?”

Nodding Jaskier presented the goat with the ripe apple, laughing at her happy yelp and smiling when she laid down in the soft grass to munch at the fruit.

“Thank you….that was very kind of you to offer your food to as strangers pet.”

Jaskier shrugged, intrigued by the friendly Witcher. “I don’t mind. She seems to like it.” They both looked over to Lil´ Bleater who drooled all over the apple.

“Well…” Eskel sat down next to the bard. “Do you have a name or do I have to continue to call you “beautiful stranger” in my head?”

Jaskiers mouth fell open, a silent “Oh” on his lips. He couldn’t remember when someone had last called him beautiful and he swallowed hard to push his growing anxiety down.

“Jaskier, travelling bard, at your Service.”

“Oh!” Eskel smiled openly at him and Jaskiers stomach did a funny flip.

“I heard about you! You are the one that made that “Toss a Coin” song! My brother Lambert and I are so very grateful for that! Our lives have gotten so much easier since you came up with it!”

The bard smiled widely, filled with a rush of happiness but before he could respond the Witcher continued.

“What a happy coincidence to run into Geralts bard!”

Jaskiers face fell, not able to repress the flood of emotions that must clearly show on his face.

“I am not Geralts bard, or Geralts anything…not anymore!”

His voice was calm and quiet but hard and full of ice and Eskel blinked in surprise.

“I see….I am sorry if I said something that hurt your feelings or brought up bad memories? It was not my intention. Please forgive me.”

To Jaskiers absolute horror he felt himself starting to tear up and before he could do anything about it hot streaks of wetness covered his cheeks. He had spent twenty fucking years with Geralt and not even once had the asshole apologized to him for anything and yet here was this Witcher he had only known for five minutes caring about his feelings.

“Oh shit…I am sorry! Did I say something wrong? Fuck!” A hesitant arm reached out and gently grabbed Jaskiers shoulder. The bard continued sobbing and all but threw himself at Eskel burring his head into the Witchers chest, grabbing at the other's shirt in despair.

He expected to be thrown off but instead warm and strong arms gently wrapped around him, a comforting hand brushed gently through his hair.

“Schh, it’s all right little bard. It’s okay. Let it out.” The softness and warmth in Eskels voice made him only sob harder, his mind flooded with relief to let go and hot shame that he would fall apart in front of a stranger like this.

Eskel held him tightly, still stroking his hair, softly rocking him in his arms like a small child.

“It’s okay, I got you. Just let go.” Jaskier couldn’t help himself but bury his head deeper against the Witcher. His mind running wild with regret and frustration.

Finally, he let go of the other man, unhappy to leave the other arms but sitting up and wiping angrily at his face.

“Shit! Eskel! I am so very sorry! Here I am knowing you for five minutes and already crying all over you…” He took a small handkerchief out of his pocket and wiped at Eskels Armor, trying to get rid of the tears and snot.

Eskel gently captures his wrist and looked at him softly. “It’s alright…. Do you feel better now?”

“I…I think so…fuck…this is so messed up. I promise I’m usually not that emotional….actually I am but I don’t randomly cry over strangers.”

Eskel shrugged and smiled as Lil´ Beater came over, resting her head in Jaskier laps who absentmindedly scratched between her little ears.

“I don’t mind getting cried on. I am just glad you feel better. Do you want to talk about it?”

“I…Are you sure…it’s not a pretty story and I’m afraid I don’t have nice things to say about your brother.”

Eskel nodded, reaching down and petting his goat as well, brushing his hand against Jaskiers every once in a while as he listened to the bards' story. The Witcher got angrier and angrier the longer Jaskier spun his tale. He had always known that Geralt was an emotionally constipated Idiot but what fool would freely throw away such a grand gift as the bards' care and friendship. He swore to himself to have words with his brother when he next saw him.

“…and that’s when I ran into you and….I’m sorry what’s the little one's name again?”

Eskel smiled, still petting the goat. “Lil´ Bleater….”

“Ohh, that’s a great name for her! She’s so cute!” He gently booped at the goat's nose who bleated in response “Aren’t you just the cutest!?”

Eskel stared in wonder at the beautiful bard in front of him, suddenly feeling warm and nervous. Before his mouth could catch up with his brain he heard himself say: “Would you like to travel with us?”


	3. Basic Kindness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jaskier is not used to nice things

Jaskier looked up in surprise, not having expected such an offer.

“Are you sure? I’m told I’m too loud, too shrill, too much. I….I sing a lot…and hum…and talk all the time. I…I’m not a good travel companion. I would slow you down…and…I’m pretty useless.”

“You, my dear, are everything but useless. Your song…it changed the world. I get meals now without rotten meat and spit in it. I am allowed to stay in inns, in beds even and not just in drafty stables. People nod in greeting and children stopped crying at my face. You are a wonder.”

Jaskier swallowed hard to keep himself from crying again and threw Eskel an uneasy smile.

“Well…I mean if you are sure…I would like to…I mean.” He forced himself to smile wider, licking his lips nervously and missing the faint blush on Eskels cheeks.

“Well than…let’s go…you haven’t met Scorpion yet.”

“Why do you have a dangerous stingy animal?

Eskel threw his head back, loudly laughing and Jaskiers face lit up at the sound.

“He is my steed. I left him over there.” The Witcher gestured behind him and Jaskier looked to see a black horse tied to a tree a few meters off the road.

The bard nodded and got up, carefully pulling Lil´ Bleater out of his lap and gathering his stuff.

Eskel smiled and picked the little goat up, walking over to the black stallion and put her in the little basket that he had made for her so she could comfortably ride along.

“Do you want to put your stuff into the packs?”

“May I? That would be nice!”

Jaskier beamed at the Witcher and Eskel suddenly felt his knees grew weak. Shit, Geralt definitely was the biggest idiot on the continent but one Witchers trash might easily turn into another Witcher's treasure and he knew he would do anything to make sure Jaskier kept smiling at him like that.

Eskel showed him where to put his belongings and then turned to Jaskier, trying to smile without showing off his scars too much. Fuck, the bard looked at him without any disgust and expect their initial encounter he hadn’t even gazed at his scars once.

“Do you want to ride in front or in the back?”

“What?” Jaskiers eyes went wide, the surprise was written all over his face and Eskel wondered if he had managed to say the wrong thing again.

“You are taller than me so I am not sure if I could see over your shoulder if you sit in front, but I guess we could make it work if that’s what you prefer.”

Jaskier stared at him for what felt like hours before tilting his head and suddenly looking close to tears again. “You…you would allow me to touch…to ride your horse?”

Eskel cursed under his breath and wondered for the hundred times this morning what the fuck Geralts problem was. Had his brother really let the bard walk for all the time they spent together? It would clearly explain Jaskiers thick thighs and strong legs but the Witchers war horses could easily carry a man in a full plate for a long duration of time. They were specially bred for the Witchers, broader and taller than normal warhorses and there was no logical reason to not share the horse, except maybe being an utter bastard.

He gently reached out and brushed his hand over Jaskiers shoulder. “Yes of course.”

The smile that Jaskier gifted him with was breathtaking and the bard suddenly hugged him. “Ohh! Thank you Eskel! I don’t know if I prefer to be in front or in the back! I’ve only ridden with Geralt when I was too injured to notice.

“Unbelievable….” Eskel cleared his throat. “Well let’s try it with you in front and see how it goes, we can always switch it up later. “

Happily nodding Jaskier mounted the horse, which stood surprisingly still and waited for Eskel to climb up after him. He was glad the other could not see his face as he felt a deep blush creeping onto his face when he was pushed against a hard chest and abdomen and a warm arm wrapped around his waist. Holding the reins in his free hand Eskel clicked his tongue and Scorpion started with an easy trot.

The bard made sure to slightly lean to one side, resting his head against Eskels shoulder, so that the other could clearly see the road ahead.

They both shuffled until they found a comfortable position and it ended with Eskels cheek slightly pressed against Jaskiers hair who suddenly remembered that Witchers had heightened senses and the other could probably hear his racing heartbeat.

“So….where are we going?”

The bard could feel Eskel shrug behind him. “I don’t have a goal in mind. Anywhere where there is work to be had….Do you want to go somewhere specific?”

Jaskier was silent for a long time before he quietly whispered. “I…I…how about the coast?”

And without even hesitating Eskel brought Scorpion around, heading west. “The coast it is then.”


	4. Sing me a song

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jaskier learns that he is valued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can thank my "wife" Fizzy for the early Update;)

Jaskier really tried his best to be silent, to be a considerate travel companion but he felt so relaxed and at ease that he found himself humming after a while. When he noticed he immediately stopped, biting onto his lower lip angry with himself. He had promised himself to be a better companion than before. To talk and sing less, to be less annoying and needy and not hum all hours of the day and he couldn’t even keep that promise for more than three hours.

“Why did you stop?”

Jaskier blinked confused. “Why did I stop what?”

“The humming, it was nice.”

Jaskier let out a surprised yelp and almost fell off Scorpion if Eskel didn’t grab his waist, steadying him.

“Easy songbird.”

Jaskier felt himself stop breathing for a second, trying to think if Geralt had ever given him a nickname besides an angry spat “bard” which hardly counted, but nothing came to mind.

“Uhm…I can continue?”

“Please.”

The bard forced himself to relax against Eskels broad chest once more enjoying the feel of the shifting muscles behind him and started to hum again. After a while, he grew braver and quietly started to sing waiting anxiously for a reaction from the Witcher. Eskel´s arm tightened around him, lightly brushing over his hands were it came to rest, gently resting above his own, and Jaskier closed his eyes. It had been so long that someone touched him like that, gently and soft without any end goal in mind, without demanding anything from him and he let his voice become louder, his song stronger.

He could hear Eskel humming along and his heart filled with joy. He sang for hours until he had to take a break and to both their surprises he could feel a soft kiss pressed onto his hair.

“Thank you, Jaskier.”

“I…no…thank you…..”

Thankfully he was spared to say anything further as his stomach gave off a loud rumble and reminded him that he had skipped breakfast this morning.

“There is a small town ahead, can you hold on a bit longer? An hour or so? Or would you prefer to take a rest now?”

Jaskier swallowed the big knot in his throat down, overwhelmed with suddenly having choices, with being asked for his opinions his needs and wants, for being taken into consideration. He was indeed hungry but the prospect of having a warm meal in an inn sounded amazing to him. He could make with skipping lunch and go for an early dinner instead, besides he really enjoyed being pressed up against the Witcher. “I can go a bit longer.”

“Okay. Hold on.” Eskel pressed his legs into Scorpions flank, urging the stallion on an unknown need in him to take care of the bard. Jaskier didn’t know how to feel. He had known the man for all but six hours and yet he felt closer to him and more cared for than he had in twenty years with Geralt. Fuck, he needed to be very careful or he would surely fall in love with the Witcher.

He grabbed onto the knot on Scorpion’s saddle as the horse sped up and was glad that Eskel wrapped both arms around him to keep him steady. It took them only about 40 minutes to reach the tiny collection of houses that could barely be called a village. Not being used to riding for so long Jaskier felt a bit sore and eagerly stretched his leg as soon as he had solid ground under his feet.

Eskel looked at him smiling as he shook his legs and stretching. “So let’s see if this place has a decent tavern…well or any tavern, yeah?”

Jaskier nodded, grabbing his lute. “Well, time to work for my keep then.” Wrinkling his forehead Eskels arm stopped him, gently never with force and the bard looked into confused golden eyes.

“Are you sure songbird?” There was that nickname again, making Jaskier stomach tense and warm, the fluttering wings of butterflies growing inside him. “You sang all afternoon. Aren’t you tired?” Eskel´s confused face was met with an equally confused expression from Jaskier.

“Yeah but…I mean I need to earn some coin? So I can help out? Be useful to you?”

Anger set on Eskels face and he pushed a hand through is hair in frustration now sure that Geralt didn’t just deserve a talking to but a good old punch in the face.

“Songbird….Jaskier…you don’t need to earn your keep. You don’t need to do anything to….” Unable to find the right words he grunted which were accompanied by a similar grunt from Lil´ Bleater.

“I just enjoy your company. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want ok?”

Jaskier stared and stared until his face turned soft and he smiled. “Eskel…”

The Witcher was sure that nobody in his almost century of being alive had said his name like that. It sounded so soft coming from Jaskiers mouth, like a flower petal gently floating in the wind.

Not able to withstand the pull he wrapped his arms around the slender bard and hugged him. Jaskier made a soft sound and fisted his hands into the back of Eskels shirt, holding him close and pushing his head against the crook of the Witchers neck. They stood like that for minutes until Lil´ Bleater demanded attention.

Awkwardly shuffling the Witcher released the bard from his arms and pulled the goat out of her basket. Jaskier still smiled at him, wetting hips pink lips with his tongue, cornflower blue eyes shining bright in the afternoon sun. “So….lunch? Uhm…dinner? Food! I mean…food.” Cursing himself Eskel stumbled over his words but was relieved when Jaskier just smiled and nodded, putting his lute back onto Scorpion.


	5. In(n)to the Unknown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which they find an Inn

They had led the horse around town until they found a small inn that also served as a tavern and tied the stallion up in front of it, making sure that the water in the trough was fresh and free of dirt before entering the small building.

Eskel nodded at a small table in the corner before walking over to the bar and engaging in conversation with the innkeeper while Jaskier took a seat. It was strange, this weird sense of déjà vu but instead of an angry scowl, Eskel turned to him smiling, putting two mugs of Ale on the wobbly table.

“Food will take a bit but they bring it out when it’s done.” Lil´ Bleater sat under the table, happy between Jaskiers open legs, chewing at his boot. “They also have an empty room if we want to stay for the night, next town is a few days out so we better rest up before continuing on.”

Jaskier nodded, it made sense yet he wondered if Eskel was not in a hurry. “Are we not…. I mean…Don’t we have…” He shuffled around, careful not to disturb the Goat at his feet.

“Are we not in a rush? Geralt had always been in a rush?”

Eskel took a big sip from his mug and nodded to the waitress who brought them two plates of grilled venison and fruits. He let some fruit drop to the floor for Lil´ Bleater before bringing his attention back to Jaskier who happily shoved food into his mouth.

“Well, Geralt is an idiot with a brain the size of a grape. I am not him.”

“And thank the gods for that.” The Witcher smiled, looking down at his food to hide his creeping blush but Jaskier noticed anyway.

“A warm bed would be nice! Do they have rooms with two beds?”

“I doubt it, but I don’t mind taking the floor songbird.”

Jaskier frantically shook his head, sauce dripping onto his chin and all that Eskel wanted to do was to reach over the table and wipe it off with his thumb, he stopped himself, hand already half across the table as Jaskier continued. “Definitely not Witcher. If there’s only one bed we can share.”

“You…you would share a bed with…a Witcher?”

Jaskier blinked. “Do you snore?” Eskel shook his head. “Do you steal the covers?” Another gestured refusal. “Are your feet so cold that they are basically covered in ice while the rest of you burns like molten lava?” Eskel laughed loudly at that. “No?”

“Well, then you are already a way better bedmate than the last Witcher I shared with.” Jaskier laughed and sauce dripped from his chin onto the table and this time Eskel didn’t stop himself. He reached out and gently put his thumb onto Jaskiers face, holding his chin up with his hand and carefully wiping over the warm skin.

Jaskier held eye contact with him, silently staring and he had to pretend to focus on the goat under the table before doing something else stupid, like kissing him.

“Uhm…thanks…”

The bard sounded unsure and Eskel silently cursed. Mad at himself he went back to his food his thoughts going wild. Why did he think touching the bard so intimately would be welcomed? He knew that his hands were rough and calloused, his face so disfigured and grotesque that even whores preferred to not look at him directly when he fucked them. Yes, Jaskier had smiled at him openly and there had not been fear or disgust in his eyes but he could have easily acted. And even if his friendliness was genuine that didn’t mean he wanted Eskel to fucking touch him.

“Eskel?”

He looked up, carefully to not look directly at the bard.

“Did I….are you mad at me?”

Flabbergasted Eskel stared at him. “Why would I be mad at you!?”

“I…well we were talking and suddenly you made that sour Witcher face and…If I did anything you can just yell at me it’s okay…I’m used to it.”

Shocked Eskel stared at him and then slowly reached for Jaskiers hand, carefully not to rub his calloused skin too much over Jaskiers smooth one. “That…Jaskier…no that’s is not okay. It’s not okay for me or anyone else to shout at you when angry or sad or whatever. I…I promise for as long as we travel together I will not do that. I might get frustrated at you or even be mad at you for some reason but that doesn’t mean I will just….Gods…songbird.”

Jaskier smiled weakly and to Eskels amazement he intertwined his slender fingers with the Witchers. “I…thank you….so you are not mad?”

“No songbird I am not mad. Just a bit tired from travelling, that’s all.” It was not the complete truth but all Eskel dared himself to say.

“Well, then we should definitely rent a room and rest early!” Jaskiers smile came back and Eskel wondered if it was real or fake not sure how to read the bard yet. He decided that for now, it didn’t matter, he would learn soon enough and in the meantime, he would just to make sure that Jaskier was happy and well-taken care of.

“You want more food? Ale? Cake?” The Witcher noticed how the bard's eyes twinkled at the word cake but Jaskier shook his head. “No thanks, I am full. You still need to tell me how much I owe you?”

“You don’t owe me anything songbird. I gladly paid for the food and drinks.”

“Are you sure I can…can I do anything else for you?”

Eskel sighed a bit of sadness in the sound as he wondered how bad the bard must have been treated in the past. “I am sure Jaskier. You owe me nothing, ok?”

“Okay…”

“Now, why don’t you get our stuff and see where we can put Scorpion in for the night while I get us a room, ok?”

Jaskier nodded and shuffled outside eager to at least do this. He brushed gently trough Scorpions mane, happily surprised that the stallion let him and took a few moments to calm himself. Eskels whole behaviour baffled him. He couldn’t understand this Witcher so far but yet he truly wanted to get to know him. There was something so intriguing about him that Jaskier knew he would do anything to keep travelling with him for as long as he could.

He knew that he had broken his promise to not travel with another Witcher again, the pain of losing Geralt still raw but he could not help himself to wonder what destiny had planned for him. He believed it was no coincidence that she had set him onto this path. Unlike Geralt, Eskel had only been warm and kind to him, considerate even and it made him long for…something.

Besides the fact that he wasn’t used to being treated this way not even by the many lovers he had taken, no they only wanted him for his reputation and skills but didn’t really care about him as a person at all. Not unlike Geralt, who had eagerly used the coin he had brought with his songs but had otherwise not cared about him, had not even called him his friend. He momentarily wondered when he had started to let people treat him this way.

All his life people had used him, his parents, his friends, his lovers, Geralt and not once not even once had someone asked him what he wanted, what he needed and now that he had met Eskel who did just that he didn’t know how to react to it. He was 120 years old and yet he suddenly felt like a small child unsure how to deal with the overwhelming flood of emotions.

Shaking his head he took a few deep breaths in to calm down and started to look for a suitable stable. As it turned out the little hamlet only had one stable so there was no choice to be made and after paying the stable keeper he gathered their stuff and hurried back to the inn. Unlike Geralt, Eskel was still waiting for him downstairs, smiling and leading him up to their room.


	6. Ice, Ice Bard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jaskier has cold feet, literally.

The Witcher opened the small window, letting the still warm evening air in and helped Jaskier with the packs and satchels. Jaskier smiled, setting himself up onto the small table and started to write. He could hear Eskel move around in the small room, finally setting onto the bed, leaning against the wall, his long legs stretched out with a book of his own.

Jaskier wrote for a while before without looking up he smiled and said: “You are staring at me Eskel.”

The Witcher chuckled, the deep sound sending shivers over Jaskiers back. “You are pushing your tongue out when you are deep in thought. It’s adorable.” Jaskier blushed a deep crimson but didn’t respond otherwise, focusing his attention back onto his book.

Eskel was also trying to read but he noticed that the dim light gave him some issues with the handwriting in the book. Frustrated he fished for his pack, taking his filigree reading glasses out and pushing them up on his nose, trying very hard to ignore the bard's intense stare.

Jaskier was still staring after five minutes and he snapped his head back up. He was aware that they made his face even uglier but he still needed them for small print and handwritings.

“It’s not polite to stare as you had informed me earlier songbird.”

“Oh, I am sorry. I….They just, the glasses they suit you. Very handsome.”

Eskels gaze turned angry just as Jaskier looked away, why would the bard lie in such a cruel way to him? He would gain nothing from being mean. He looked up and found the bard, absorbed with his book a slight red colour on his cheeks and nose.

Could he really have meant it? Could he really think of Eskel as handsome? Frustrated he tried to read further but suddenly the pleasure of reading wasn’t present anymore.

He got up and started to undress to get ready for bed. Jaskier had moved his legs up onto the chair, the book resting on his pulled up kneed, his eyes just above the book staring at Eskel. He knew he was impolite but he could not help himself and observe as the man undressed.

He was indeed broader and thicker than Geralt if slightly less tall and astonishingly handsome. His skin had an alluring tan and his dark body hair made Jaskier´s mouth water. He tried to look away but was fascinated by the scars on Eskels body, gorgeous signs of strength and survival. The bard sighed and averted his gaze as Eskel put his nightshirt on and crawled into bed, trying to take as little space up as possible.

“You can stretch out Esk.”

Eskel stopped moving, flabbergasted at the nickname and looked up. Jaskier was putting his book away and not looking at him. Maybe he had misheard? He had never been given a nickname before. Besides the usual Witcher related slurs, the only kind name he had been called was “brother” but nothing as sweet as his shortened name had sounded from Jaskiers lips.

“That is very sweet of you but I don’t need all that space songbird. You offered to share which was very kind and I won’t have you sleep on the smaller part of the bed.

Jaskier grunted an amused “Witchers,” before changing into his own nightclothes and blowing the candle out. The warm summer air kept floating in through the window and yet Jaskier preferred to sleep underneath a blanket. Since there was only one he made sure that Eskel had enough of the covers left to sleep under if he wished so. 

There was an awkward moment of silence between them which bothered Jaskier so much he decided to do something about it.

“Hey Esk?” There was that name again, making Eskels belly flip and tug on his heart.

“Yes?”

“Remember when I asked if you had ice-cold feet?”

“Yes? Why?” The Witcher turned around to look at Jaskier just in time to see his shit-eating grin.

“You never asked about my feet.”

Grinning Jaskier pressed his freezing feet against Eskels calf’s who made a tiny squeaking sound at the cold embrace.

“Oh by the gods, songbird!” Jaskier laughed and was about to pull his feet back when Eskels hand reached for his right foot, rubbing it between his hands.

“Here, let me help.”

Flabbergasted Jaskier watched as the Witcher sat up and rubbed his foot until it felt warmer. The callouses on Eskel hands felt exciting on his smooth skin and the Witcher applied just the right amount of pressure.

With a satisfied sigh, the bard let himself fall back into the mattress, closing his eyes and smiling in bliss as Eskels thumb pushed into a knot on his right heel before switching to the left foot and repeating the whole process.

By the time he was done Jaskier was deeply asleep, his feet perfectly warm. Eskel smiled and laid down as well, making sure to give the bard enough space before allowing himself to drift off to sleep.


	7. Old habits die hard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Waking up can be stressfull

The Witcher found himself in the comfortable state between sleeping and being awake, drifting in and out, his mind still clinging to the beautiful dream he had had. Eskel was feeling snug and cosy, unusual but not unwelcomed feelings. He was wrapped in a fluffy blanket and there was a warm arm around him, a warm body pressing against him.

Suddenly he felt wide awake, his eyes widened as he remembered that Jaskier had agreed to share the bed with him last night and was now under the same blanket as his, his naked legs rubbing against Eskels and still fast asleep. He can’t breathe for a moment until he forces himself to relax.

So what if he had never been held like this before, not since his own mother had held him as a small child. He still remembered the lullaby she had sung for him. Jaskiers breathe tickled against his neck and suddenly the embraced tightened and he could feel soft lips brush against the base of his neck, right at the ends of his hair.

Eskel pressed his eyes shut, suddenly overwhelmed with emotions and feeling like crying but instead of getting up as he should he put his arms above Jaskiers, gently soaking in the feel of his skin. In his sleep, the bard shuffled and rolled his hips forward and his morning erection poked against Eskels thigh.

The Witcher made a weak chocking noise and automatically pushed back, not thinking about the consequences. Jaskier made a small pleased sound and pressed Eskel against the wall on the other side of the bed before his grip loosened and he turned to his other side, curling up against the pillow and slightly snoring.

Eskel didn’t dare to move for about twenty minutes before managing to will his own growing erection down and slowly leave the bed. Jaskier immediately rolled onto his side, comfortable resting in the dip he had left in the straw mattress and slept on. He decided to check for breakfast so he took his satchel and went downstairs.

A while later Jaskier woke, slowly blinking his eyes open and stretching in comfort before realizing that the bed next to him was cold.

Curious he sat up, rubbed over his eyes, his fluffy hair hanging into his eyes and looked around the room. There was no sign of Eskel. All of his belongings were gone and the cold clutches of despair grabbed Jaskiers heart.

Again. It had happened again. Another Witcher who had felt he was not worthy enough to travel with. Before with Geralt, he would have hurried to get up and race after the Witcher but now he just felt boneless and tired. The bard let himself fall back onto the mattress and curled up, hugging his knees close to his chest.

Maybe his father had truly been correct, maybe he was just a waste of space, not worth the air he breathed. Hot streams of tears fell down his eyes, his hand clinging in the sheets that still smelled like Eskel and small sobs left his mouth. Had he been too loud? Too forward with his physical affection? Had he moved too fast too soon again? Was it his singing? Like pie without any…

The dark memories came back and he started to shake uncontrollably in the small bed. Suddenly he was forced up into a sitting position, and amber eyes fixated on his.

“Jaskier? What’s wrong songbird? Are you hurt? Bad dreams?” Eskels warm gaze took the bard him, looking him over for any injuries.

“Please tell me songbird so I can fix it.”

Another loud sob passed Jaskiers lips and he wrapped his arms around Eskel and pressed his face against the Witchers shoulder, trying to make the tears stop. Eskel tenderly petted his hair and rocked him in his arms.

“Talk to me songbird.”

Jaskier took a deep breath and looked away, ashamed of his reaction.

“I...I woke up and you weren’t there and….your things were gone and….Geralt he….sometimes he…”

Jaskier wiped over his face and let out a sad laugh. “He would sometimes just leave without a word and I had to hunt him down again and…”

“You thought I had left you behind….”

Nodding Jaskier tried to move but Eskel pulled him back against his chest and pressed a small kiss against the bard’s forehead.

“Songbird….” Eskel smiled softly at the bard. “I promise if we should part I will inform you first and I hope you would do the same?”

“Yes of course…I….I am sorry Esk. I can’t believe I cried on you. Again!”

Eskel laughed, feeling warm at the sound of the nickname.

“It’s alright sweet thing, come on let's have breakfast.”

“Just, give me a minute, okay? I’ll be right down?”

“Of course, take all the time you need sweet thing.” Eskel kissed the crown of his head and Jaskier had to fight his blush down.

He waited until the Witcher had left and then rapidly washed his face and got dressed before grabbing his belonging and joined the Witcher downstairs to eat.


	8. Flirting! Wasn´t Flirting....

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a Jar full of Teeth makes an apperance

Breakfast was an easy affair, Eskel enjoyed taking his time in the morning and Jaskier realized this after he had already wolfed down half of the fried eggs and bacon. The Witcher didn’t yell at him to hurry up, instead was lazily sipping at his steaming cup of tea and smiling at the bard.

“So I was up early so I could gather some supplies before we set out again, the next town is about a week away.”

Jaskier nodded, wiping egg yolk from his chin and forcing himself to actually slow down and taste the food. A small smile formed on his lips as he let himself enjoy the well-cooked meal instead of hurrying up. “Thank you Esk. I promise I will help out in the future!”

Eskel sighed but nodded. He understood Jaskiers need to help, to feel needed and useful even if it wasn’t necessary. The bard’s presence and the company was payment enough and he was happy to provide for the bard in any way shape or form. Eskel wasn’t stupid, he knew that he was way over his head, having the bard only known for 24 hours and yet the idea of being not with him disturbed him deeply.

He looked up, smiling, his head slightly tilted so that his scars weren’t on display. “It’s alright sweet thing. I am sure we can come to an agreement that works for us both.” The words were meant as reassurance and an offer of friendship but Eskel realized how they sounded when Jaskiers eyes darkened, his pupils widened and he lazily licked his lips.

“Oh, I am sure we will dear Witcher.” Fuck. Eskels breath hitched. That wasn’t what he had meant. He didn’t want the bard to offer himself up out of a false sense of owing him something or even worse, out of pity. And yet, there was a pull in his stomach, sharp and steady and for a second he allowed himself to wonder what Jaskier hands would feel on his body. How his breath would sound, coming ragged and in gasps. How those plush lips would look wrapped around his-

“Great. You can help during camping in the wild then.” Eskel couldn’t recognize his own voice, suddenly feeling way too warm and winded.

“Oh. I mean I guess I can…I…you will have to show me how, though.” The Witcher watched as Jaskier leaned back and his expression turned disappointed for a second before setting on an easy smile once more.

“Of course sweet thing, Ill teach you anything you want to know.”

Jaskier smile turned bright and he nodded. He had always wanted to learn how to properly set traps and firesides but Geralt had always said it would be a waste of time to teach him and after a while, the bard had just stopped asking. He felt glad that Eskel had offered to teach him some survival skills and every time the Witcher called him “sweet thing” his stomach turned and twisted in the best way possible.

They finished eating and made their way to the stable, feeding Scorpion and Lil´ Bleater who had also slept in the stall and made their way further west.

* * *

Like the previous day, Jaskier sat in front of Eskel, humming and smiling and enjoying the warm summer sun. He felt free and happy for the first time in a long time and he didn’t even need to ask for a lunch break. Before he could say anything Eskel suggested to take rest at the small stream they rode by and handed Jaskier some dried Jerky. Eskel made sure that his animals were watered and fed and smiled as Jaskier sat close to him on a flat rock and putting his naked feet into the water.

“That’s how you gonna get cold feet again sweet thing.” Eskel laughed as Jaskier shrugged and smiled sheepishly. “I guess you have to rub them warm again then.” It was meant as a joke but warmth spread through Jaskier when Eskel just nodded, smiling and for once not bothering to hide his scar.

Jaskier smiled and brought his attention back to the small Goat at his side, petting her as Eskel reached out and picked up a pretty little stone. The Witcher reached for his satchel and fished a glass jar out of one of the compartments. He loosened the big cork stopper and put the rock inside of it.

“What’s that?” Jaskier asked and blinked in wonder as Eskel slightly blushed.

The bard immediately brought his hands up and shook his head. “I mean you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. I’m just curious.”

Eskel smiled and sighed. “It’s stupid….Its…I read about it in a book.” He pulled the Jar out of his satchel again and handed it over to the bard. “It’s an old Rendanian praxis. It’s called “A Jar full of Teeth” and yes I’m aware that there are no teeth in it.” Jaskier snorted and waited for the Witcher to continue.

“I read about it a very long time ago, about seventy or so years. A young mother would collect her children’s baby teeth and put them in a jar to remember all the happy memories of her children growing up.” He paused for a moment and looked away, his cheeks flushed. “I….I started it after I survived a really hard battle.” Eskels hand unconsciously came up to his facial scar before he coughed and continued. “Every time I survive something I shouldn’t or I am just really grateful and happy I put something in it. Like a stone or a button or something.”

Jaskier smiled, torn between thinking the whole thing was enchanting and being sad because the jar only contained 5 things, including the stone that Eskel had just put in it. Seventy years, and yet the Witcher had only put five things in the jar.

“I…Why the stone now?”

Eskel shrugged, not daring to directly look at Jaskier who leaned his head against his shoulder.

“I see….” Tenderly Jaskier reached out and grabbed Eskels hand. They sat in silence for a while until Lil´ Bleater demanded attention and jumped between them.

Jaskier laughed and pulled the goat onto his lap, feeding her some old bread. “So what are the other things for?”

Eskel opened the jar and pulled the four older items out. “This is the reason I started the jar…” He showed Jaskier a piece of broken metal, like a part of a sword that had broken off, and Jaskier could see dried blood on it. “It’s…a reminder…to do better…and that I survived.”

“So not exactly a happy memory then?” “No…but an important one.”

“This.” And he showed Jaskier a feather. “This I picked up even before the sword piece….its….I just found it in the courtyard in Kaer Morhen. I think it’s an owl feather….but it fell down right after Lambert called me his brother for the first time.” Jaskier smiled and carefully put the feather back into the container.

“This is a pebble that was stuck in Bleaters hoof when I found her.” The little Goat made a happy sound at her name and both men chuckled.

“And this Earring…I…it used to belong to my mother…I think….”

Eskels hands were shaking slightly when he put everything back into the jar and Jaskier swore to himself that he would do anything to make sure that the jar got filled to the brim fast.


	9. Sing your heart out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which they both think the other one is attractive

After their comfortable lunch, Jaskier stretched and grabbed his Lute from Scorpions saddle straps and started to walk.

“Are you not riding with me?” Eskel sounded surprisingly disappointed as he watched the bard walk next to Scorpion.

“I can hardly play the lute while riding and I thought I sing you a song?”

“Oh…yes…that would be nice.” Eskel had to swallow hard as Jaskiers whole face light up brightly smiling like the sun, his posture changed and suddenly he was oozing charm and confidence. How could the Witcher resist his offer, even if he wanted to feel Jaskiers body move against his while riding together.

“Any requests?”

“Uhm…I….Something you have written? Something new?”

Jaskiers posture changed once again as he raised his head high up, his êxpression was proud and powerful as he walked on singing.

_This is gospel for the fallen ones  
Locked away in permanent slumber  
Assembling their philosophies  
From pieces of broken memories  
This is the beat of my heart  
Their gnashing teeth and criminal tongues  
Conspire against the odds  
But they haven't seen the best of us yet  
  
If you love me, let me go  
These words are knives and often leave scars  
The fear of falling apart  
Truth be told, I never was yours  
The fear of falling apart  
  
This is gospel for the vagabonds  
Ne'er-do-wells and insufferable bastards  
Confessing their apostasies  
Led away by imperfect impostors  
This is the beat of my heart  
Don't try to sleep through the end of the world  
And bury me alive  
Cause I won't give up without a fight_

Jaskier didn’t look at him when he had finished the song, he took some deep breathes and walked on, singing now, classic tunes about fair maidens and drinking, but Eskel didn’t hear. All he wanted was to halt his horse and jump down to pull Jaskier into his arms, making sure that the bard would never feel like that ever again.

Meanwhile, Jaskier was singing in automatic mode, having sung those classic ballads so often he could do them without having to focus his thoughts on the task which left him able to think about Eskels Jar some more. He felt grateful and trusted that the other had shown him but also sad that it only had 5 little things in it.

He didn’t know Eskel well enough yet to figure out what would make the other happy but he would do his best to make him smile. Jaskier knew that he well on the way to develop romantic feelings for the man and that it would be wiser to leave before getting his heart broken by another Witcher again but Eskel was so different so easy to be with and kind that he could not do anything but stay.

He was also very easy on the eyes and last night, when he had put on his reading glasses, Jaskiers heart had almost stopped, half-hard in his breeches. And the way he held him and comforted him, gods how was he supposed to react to such kindness and the free offer of friendship. Eskel smiled openly at him, didn’t rush him or push him. He didn’t yell for him to be quiet, no he seemed to actually enjoy his singing quite a lot if the humming behind him was any indication. He had shared a bed with him without arguing first, had made sure he had the bigger space and had held him at night. Geralt who?

He hadn’t felt that taken care of since….maybe ever? He almost snorted and fumbled over a line of song but caught himself. Eskel was handsome and funny and kind. He glanced back and met the Witchers soft gaze as he looked right at him smiling. Jaskier turned back around, strutting now and making sure to sway his hips while walking, feeling Eskels burning eyes on his backside all day long.

The Witcher knew he should focus his eyes onto the path instead of Jaskiers backside but thankfully Scorpion was able to follow the road on his own because he couldn’t find the energy to avert his eyes.

Every step the bard took he could see his leg muscles work underneath the tight trousers he wore. His strong thick thighs moved almost like a dance and he could do nothing but stare, his mouth suddenly dry.

He sighed almost inaudible and remembers the feel of Jaskier grinding against him in his sleep. It’s a fascinating fact that his clothing seems fitted while it actually hides most of his buff physique. The stripy pattern moved his Waistline, making the bard seem shorter, his torso tinier than it truly was. The cut of the shoulders hid how broad the bard is and his posture made him even daintier.

Eskel things that he’s even prettier when he stands tall and strong but he is smart enough to realize that as an entertainer he has to present a certain image. Yet, he is fascinated by the difference and if he allows it even his eyes are fooled. It’s a trick of pattern, fabric choice and design and the bard looks wonderful no matter what but Eskel prefers him like now when he’s walking tall and proud, his wide shoulder pulled back and his voice strong and deep.

He wondered how the bard’s voice would sound in other circumstances. Would his voice get higher or deeper if full of lust and longing? How much would it take to make him breathy? As a singer he had well-trained lungs, it would take some time to get him winded. Would he moan or whine in pleasure and how far down did the bards deliciously blush reach?

It was one thing for him to lust after the bard, that was easy to deal with, easy to ignore and push aside but it was a whole different thing to push down the urge to protect, to provide and care for. Every time Jaskier looked at him the blue eyes full of joy and happiness something untangled inside of him. Jaskier smile suddenly became the most important thing in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song is, of course, Gospel by Panic! at the Disco and in my head it was the slower more intense piano version:)


	10. The Scent of Chamomile Oil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jaskier offers to give Eskel a Massage

After a few hours, it now being late afternoon, he noticed that Jaskier slowed down a bit. Not enough to really be a remarkable change but Eskel realized that the bard must be tired, yet he didn’t ask to stop for the night. Making sure that they were in a good spot for camp Eskel called out to him.

“We should make camp here for the night. Get some rest.”

“I can go on.”

There was some underlining anger in Jaskiers voice, and something else? Fear? Had Geralt made him walk more than he could take? Sure the bard wasn’t human, his elven features clearly visibly trough the glamour he wore. Anyone with a basic understanding of magic could easily see that but still, that didn’t mean he should be made walking to the point of exhaustion. For some reason, Eskel felt that in this case, an indirect approach might be best as he halted Scorpion and dismounted.

“That may be so sweet thing but I and Scorpion are tired. My backside hurts from riding all day.”

“Oh, I have some oil for that!” The bard smiled and babbled on before thinking. “I can massage you! Its chamomille! It should be fine for your sensitive nose.”

Eskel stopped in his tracks, where he was unloading Scorpions saddle packs and glad his back was turned to the bards who just took a sharp gasp of breath in after he realized how his offer sounded.

“Uhm, I mean for your shoulders and such. You know….”

Eskel kept unloading their stuff, making sure to put everything down orderly and opened his to thank Jaskier and refuse his offer. What did leave his lips though was: “Thank you that would be appreciated, sweet thing.”

“Oh, yeah that’s great! Uhm after dinner?”

The Witcher could hear the nervousness in Jaskier voice and wanted to laugh it up as a joke when the sweet smell of excitement hit his nostrils. He took a deep breath in and suddenly his head was spinning as his nose filled with Jaskiers delicious scent.

“I’ll go hunting. Can you make a fire?” Eskel needed to get away fast. Now.

He slightly turned around to look at the bard, who shrugged.

“I can try!”

Nodding Eskel all but fled deeper into the woods in search for prey.

Jaskier looked after him, his eyes still lingering after the Witcher had vanished between the trees. He sighed and tried to set up camp as best as he could, while also playing with Lil´ Bleater who felt restless after spending all day in her basket.

He had watched Geralt countless times prepare the fire pit but he had never done it himself and he hoped it was good enough to please his new Witcher. He briefly wondered if he had some weird fetish until he realized that he just had a thing for strong kind men and that even Geralt someway fell into that category.

After he was done with building a fire pit and partly satisfied with it he made sure to set up everything else and to feed the animals before sitting onto his bedroll deep in thought. He pulled out one pair of socks and rolled them up to throw and play a form of catch with Lil Bleater, while absentmindedly scribbling into his notebook. His mind was full of ideas about lyrics.

He could hear Eskel stalking back to camp almost an hour later at the last light of day, 4 rabbits in tow. They smiled at each other and the Witcher put them down. “The fire looks good, just next time make the pit a bit deeper.” Proud that his work didn’t get scolded Jaskier nodded. “Will you show me how to skin the rabbits properly?”

“Of course sweet thing, come here.” Watching Eskel work was a delight to Jaskier but he had a hard time contracting as the other man took his hands in his to show him how to correctly hold the knife. The bard still tried his best and did one of the rabbits by himself Eskel gently correcting his technique and praising him when he adapted to the criticism.

Every time a compliment left Eskels lips Jaskier shifted, goosebumps running over his spines and he was grateful when the moment was over and they skewered the rabbits onto twigs to grill them over the open fire.

They ate in comfortable silence while Lil´ Bleater munched her was trough Jaskiers sock ball and Scorpion slept. The horse had indeed been tired and after Jaskier had fed him he closed his eyes.

The Witcher swallowed the last bit of meat down and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand when Jaskier got up and pulled a small glass vial out of his satchel.

“The massage will be easier if you undress my dear.”


	11. Massage your heart out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a Massage happens

Eskel took a deep breath in as he started to flick the buttons on his shirt open before pulling it and the shoulder armour off. He looked up and met Jaskier burning eyes, the bard clearly staring, licking his lips.

Gods, this was gonna be torture.

“Your trousers too Esk.” Jaskiers voice sounded deeper than usual like he was already out of breath.

The Witcher shivered but did at he is told, folding his trousers and lying down onto his bedroll just in his smallclothes. He could clearly hear Jaskier shuffling around behind him and then the second bedroll was pulled next to his and Jaskier was kneeling down.

There was a moment of anticipation where nothing happened and then suddenly the air between them feels heavy like on fire. He could feel the warm drip of oils hit his skin and Jaskiers rugged voice in his ear.

“Is it…is the smell okay?” Eskel inhaled deeply and pushed his eyes shut as he is hit with a warm wave of Jaskiers sweet scent. There was something salty and musky about him from travelling all day on dusty roads in the heat but he could also smell Jaskiers base scent. Eskel had to bite his lips to suppress a moan as he was hit with Sandalwood, Elderflower and a hint of parchment paper.

Jaskier smelled good enough to eat and for a moment Eskel thought about doing just that. Then warm fingers made contact with his back and he stopped thinking altogether for a while. Jaskiers hand were soft with rough parts on his fingertips from playing the lute and felt like the best thing that Eskel had ever experienced.

“Oh your warm, that’s nice!” Jaskiers breathy laugh sounded like music in Eskels ears and he grunted in response. There was a pause above him, he could hear Jaskier swallowing but then he continued to trace the scars on his back, gently and caring and Eskel could feel his eyes starting to water.

He had not been touched in 14 months. That was the last time had bought a whore, he had tried to hire one earlier this year but they had refused to service a Witcher, especially one as ugly as him. His shoulders tightened, not used to the feather-light touches that served no purpose than to relax him.

“Is everything okay Esk?”

“Yes…I…I’m just not used to people touching me like this.”

Confusion built on Jaskiers face and he wrinkled his forehead. “Like what? Do…Oh, gods? Did I hurt you!?” Panic made its way into Jaskiers voice and Eskel reached for his thigh.

“No! You are not…it’s…nice….warm…soft.”

“Oh….” Jaskier felt his heart break all over again. “Just let me know if I do something you don’t like please?”

Eskel nodded and laid back down so Jaskier could continue to gently brush his hands over his back, tracing the scars with tender fingers and rubbing the oil in the dried skin. He started on Eskels left side and worked his way from the shoulder blade down to his foot. Jaskiers hand moved to the other foot and worked his way back up. So far he had only gently touched but as soon as he reached the second shoulder blade he started to apply pressure.

The amount of force he used made Eskel melt under him like butter in the sun. He never used to much, just enough to loosen the knots in his shoulders to ease his muscles into relaxation and it was heaven.

“Jaskier?” The hands immediately stopped, waiting, respecting if he chooses to stop the massage,”

“Could you sing while you….”

“Of course dear heart.”

Eskel moved his head to lie on his hands, looking away from Jaskier, tears now freely streaming from his eyes. Jaskier had massaged all restraint out of him and he didn’t have the energy to hold them back in, not after being called dear heart.

Jaskier worked on his body for over an hour until he was pliant and soft under him. He felt himself slowly drifting off, his body not used to such a relaxed state. Jaskier voice lulled him even further to sleep and he could feel the leftover oil being wiped away before his blanket was wrapped over him and the bard gently kissed his forehead.

“Good night dear heart.”

“Hmm…night Jask.”

The bard smiled and laid down onto his own bedroll, not bothering to pull it to the other side of the fire again, happy to rest right next to Eskel. The Witcher seemed to have enjoyed his massage and he was glad to be of use. He had been half aroused during the whole process, Eskels shifting muscles under his hands, slippery from the oil had felt like heaven and Jaskier had to stop a few times to calm his breathing.

The singing had helped, had given his mind something different to latch on. He could hear Eskel shuffle behind him and then he was pressed against a hard, naked chest and wrapped in strong arms.

He could get used to this.


	12. Call me by my name

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jaskier slips up

Waking up for a Witcher was commonly a quick affair. There was no lazy stretching or relaxing in a warm bed. You woke up, you got up, and you started your day. Yet, this was the second day in a row that Eskel found himself lingering.

The early morning sun had just made its way up in the sky and the happy cheeping of birds could be heard. Eskel was warm and his whole body felt relaxed and rested like never before. He wiggled his toes, pushing Lil´ Bleater carefully off his feet and stretched.

He felt lighter and without thinking a big smile crept on his face as he turned around to face Jaskier. The bard was still resting in deep slumber, laying on his side, facing the Witcher, his head resting on his own arm.

He shivered slightly in the morning wind and Eskel shuffled closer until there was only and only a handful of space between them, sharing his body heat and pulling Jaskiers blanket carefully around the bard.

Jaskier smiled in his slumber and rested his head against Eskels chest, a happy sigh leaving his lungs. Eskel knew he had to get up soon, feed his goat and take care of Scorpion, but he exploited the feeling of Jaskier in his arms until the last possible minute.

When Jaskier started to move he tried to pull away but was met with beautiful shimmering blue eyes and he froze, his arms still wrapped around the bard.

“Good morning!” Jaskier leaned over and gave him a small peck on his nose, laughing apparently in a very good mood.

“Morning sweet thing.”

Jaskier didn’t move out from his arms, instead, he pushed his head under Eskels chin and yawned.

“Do we have to get up already?”

Eskel smiled and pressed his nose into Jaskiers hair. He didn’t answer right away, wishing he could freeze this single one moment. The way the early sun hit Jaskiers eyes and hair, making the chestnut mane shimmer with slight hints of red and blond. The way his skin was still warm and so soft where it pushed against his. The sound of Jaskiers voice, cosy and deep and still full of sleep. The way his long eyelashes came to rest on his freckled cheeks. It was perfect and the Witcher didn’t want it to end.

“I guess we can stay a bit longer…a few more minutes.”

“Ah you are the best Ge- Eskel.”

Both of them froze, not moving. Eskel had stopped breathing and he didn’t dare to look at Jaskier. He didn’t know what to say or how to react, didn’t want to lose the bard in his arms even if he was just used as a replacement.

He wasn’t stupid. Of course, Jaskier was in love with Geralt. Why wouldn’t he be? Geralt may be rough and grumpy but also charming if he wanted to and handsome. Even their own instructor had always preferred Geralt over Eskel and Lambert. The favourite child, why should it now be any different? Geralt was stronger than him, a better swordsman, and a better tracker. The only thing he was more adept in was using magic, not that it would help him now.

He could feel Jaskier move in his arms but he wasn’t ready to let go. He couldn’t. If this was the last time he was allowed to touch the sweet and gentle bard he would savour the feeling as long as possible.

He had been wrong. He was stupid because there had been that part of him that had left his heart unguarded and now after only two days with the bard he was already halfway in love with him. It had been stupid to think he had been anything more than a cheap stand-in for Jaskier.

Jaskier tried to move again and this time the Witcher let him, opening his arms so that the bard could escape. Instead, he repositioned himself between Eskels thighs and laid himself on top of him pressing down with all his weight. The bard reached for his chin, fingers grabbing and moved his head gently, forcing him to look him in the eye.

“Eskel. Esk…My dear heart I am so sorry.” He still held the Witchers chin in his hands, his fingers gently caressing the smooth skin while his thumb pressed against the uneven scars.

“I don’t see you as a way to replace Geralt.” His blue eyes looked sincere and there was no lie to be detected in his sweet scent.

“But you miss him.” It wasn’t a question, Eskel knew that if his brother showed up and begging for the bard’s forgiveness he would leave him.

“No…I don’t. I mean I do…but it’s more….I miss the idea of him?”

Eskels expression turned confused. “What do you mean?”

“I miss the adventures we had, I miss the inspiration he provided me. I miss the adrenalin when we had to run from something. I miss taking care of someone. I miss telling stories. I miss the magic and wonder. But…none of those things have anything to do with him as a person, you know? I realized, shortly before you and I met that me following him and projecting feelings onto him was more like a daydream than anything real. My feelings for him weren’t real. Like I talked myself into them?”

The bard took a deep breath. “Because I don’t know him, as a person I mean. I don’t know what colours he likes, well besides black. I don’t know if he likes flowers if he ever listened to any of my songs. If he prefers red or white wine. I already know more about you than I ever did him and it’s bittersweet. I do care about you Eskel! I do! Please don’t be mad at me, my heart couldn’t bear it!”

Eskel stared, taking the wall of words in and raised his head slowly to smell at Jaskiers neck. There was no deceit in his scent and he nosed at the spot behind Jaskiers ear.

Jaskiers hand released his chin, to give him better access and the Witcher pressed a small kiss behind his ear.

“Esk…will you forgive me?”

“Hmm….yes…” He felt drunk. Jaskiers weight above him and even though the bard wore a nightshirt he was only in his smallclothes since he didn’t bother to get dressed again after the massage.

“You do?” Jaskier shifted above him, wrapping his own arms around Eskels chest and pushing down into him. “Thank you Eskel!”

Gods, the Witcher pressed another kiss into Jaskiers delicate skin a bit lower on his jawbone. He would forgive anything and everything the bard could ever do. He was already way too bewitched to do anything but.

He wondered how Geralt had not fallen heads over heels with the young elf. They laid together for ten more minutes until Jaskiers rumbling stomach reminded them of the early morning. The bard smiled and got up, relighting the fire under Eskels orders and brewing a small copper kettle of tea, while the Witcher got dressed and packed up their camp.


	13. Let me touch you my sweet thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Eskel gets to know Jaskier intimately 
> 
> [SMUT] ahead

Eskel was glad that Jaskier had decided to ride with him again that day, so he could hold him close. Scorpion trotted slowly and Jaskier was currently in the middle of telling him about his childhood. The Witcher made sure to listen carefully while also letting himself calmed down by Jaskiers voice.

Being almost called the wrong name still rung loud in his ears. He was not mad at Jaskier, couldn’t be, not when the bard had apologized so sweetly and honest. No, he was mad at himself for believing that there might be a chance that he and Jaskier could….

A heavy sigh left his mouth ad Jaskier turned his head back. “You okay back there?”

“Yes, just thinking.”

Grinning Jaskier winked. “Well, don’t hurt yourself while doing so.”

Eskel snorted and went back to his own thoughts. There was no way that the bard would return his affections but maybe he could at least offer him release during their lone travelling. The way Jaskier had touched him last night still lingered on his skin, he could still feel the burning sensation of those slender fingers. He wanted, no he needed those hands back on him as soon as possible.

Jaskier was humming but not paying any attention to his tune. He was still furious with himself. How dare he had called Eskel by Geralts name? What the fuck was wrong with him? He didn’t even missed Geralt, hadn’t thought of him at all since he had met the other Witcher and yet here he was.

Gods, everything had been so perfect. Eskel treated him so kind and warm and Jaskier wanted to hold onto it for as long as he could and it had only taken him 48 hours to ruin whatever thing was blossoming between them. Eskel had said he had forgiven him but Jaskier needed to find a way to truly show how sorry he was. He was already composing a ballad for Eskel in his head but he hadn’t written anything down yet.

A burp followed by a bleat brought him out of his thought as Lil´ Bleater stood on her hind legs and tried to crawl out of her basket.

“Oh. Is she okay?”

Eskel nodded behind him, the movement noticeable to Jaskier and he waited for the Witcher to continue.

“She’s just bored. We will find a nice patch of flowers and have a break in a while.”

“Oh, that’s nice…I love flowers too.”

“Of course you do buttercup.”

Jaskier laughed at the nickname and fed Lil´ Bleater a small piece of bread. She immediately calmed down and nestled back into her basket, happily munching.

“I prefer sweet thing.”

“Oh do you now…..sweet thing?”

Flirting came naturally to the bard but he hadn’t anticipated being flirted back with, not after he had fucked up this morning and was positively surprised when Eskel did.

“Oh yes…But I’m sure you can come up with other things to call me dear Witcher.”

Eskel pulled his arms back, where they rested on the saddle knot, bridle in one hand and let his finger slowly wander over Jaskiers stomach. Easy enough to be played up as an accident should the touch be unwelcomed.

“Like what little flower? What should I call you?”

Jaskiers breath hitched and his smell suddenly got thicker laced with cinnamon and honey.

“I like that one….little flower….” He pushed forward against Eskels hand, flexing his muscles against the fingers resting on his belly.

“Yeah? How about Darling?” Eskel slowed Scorpion down a bit as his hand played at the hem of Jaskiers chemise, his doublet wide open.

“Oh…my Darling Witcher.” Jaskier laughed but it sounded ragged and he pushed forward once more.

Eskel hesitated for a moment, still not sure if his touch would be welcomed before pulling the chemise out of Jaskiers trousers and pushing his hand underneath.

Jaskiers stomach was soft under his exploring fingers and he quickly found the trail of hair that grew under his navel, gently brushing through it and enjoying the little soft sight that left Jaskiers mouth.

Eskel shuffled behind the bard and his mouth found Jaskier neck, pressing a kiss against his pulse point.

“Beautiful bard.”

“Ah, that one is true….Continue.”

Eskels finger slowly made their way down to the hem of Jaskiers breeches and further down to his laces where he applied slight pressure and was very excited to find the bard hard.

“Gorgeous Angel. Sweet, sweet Jaskier.”

“Fuck…Eskel….”

“Hold on….Darling Flower.”

Jaskier gripped at Eskels thighs, waving his fingers into the fabric and held on as Eskels clever fingers unfastened his trousers with one single hand.

“Please. Eskel…more…”

The Witcher was unsure if Jaskiers plea was for his words or his hand so he decided to just give him both. He could not see but Jaskiers cock felt warm and heavy in his hand and he brought his palm up to his mouth to lick over his fingers so his touch would not feel too dry.

As soon as he wrapped his fist around Jaskiers cock the bard's hips snapped up and he moaned.

“Oh Gods, Eskel…Eskel…”

“You feel so good in my hand Sweetheart. So full and hard.”

Jaskier made a gurgling sound, his fingers now almost clawing at Eskels legs, his head thrown back against the Witchers shoulder.

He was panting and Eskel quickly brought his other hand up, he wrapped the reins around his wrist and carefully gripped Jaskiers chin and turned his head sideways.

“Can I-?”

“Yes, gods please Eskel!”

Jaskier breathed heavily against his mouth and pushed eager up into his closed fist. Smiling Eskel leaned in and captured the other's mouth in a kiss. The Witcher let his tongue drag over Jaskiers lips and slowly pushed inside his mouth. He could feel Jaskier responding, rubbing his tongue against his and only drawing back when the need for air became too apparent.

Eskel kept mouthing against his neck while trying to do his best to give Jaskier a great handjob even if the angle was all wrong and he couldn’t really see.

“Are you close my songbird?”

“Agggh….yes….Esk….oh gods….faster.”

The Witcher immediately sped up, fastening his tight grip and whispering into the bard’s ear.

“You are so beautiful like this sweet thing.” Jaskier whimpered. “Yes, just like that songbird. Come for me, Handsome.”

Jaskiers loud whine echoed through the forest but he didn’t care as he spilt his hot spent all over Eskels hand and his own stomach.

His breathing was still ragged and he smiled against Eskels shoulder.

“Oh….that….Eskel…thank you….”

The only answer was an amused grunt and then he was put back into his breeches.

Jaskier stretched his head back so he could kiss Eskel again, this time slower and deeper.

“I’ll make it up to you later at camp.”

“You don’t need-“

“I want to, my dear Witcher. Now don’t ruin my afterglow.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it sweet thing.”


	14. What is said and what is heard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there is some communication

Jaskier was quiet for the next part of their journey but it didn’t feel uncomfortable. It felt like the opposite. Like there was enough friendship and care between them that the bard didn’t feel the need to babble on or to fill the silence with meaningless words. Unlike Geralt Eskel is “loud” when he was silent. He was shifting behind him, caressing his hand and he could feel the warm breath of the Witcher against his skin.

It was just the absence of words but not the absence of care or want.

“Eskel?”

“Yes?”

“I am still sorry….”

Eskel blinked, first unsure to what the bard was referring to. “Ah yes…calling me my brother’s name.”

He pushed his arm around Jaskier and pressed him flush against his chest, ignoring Scorpion’s confused neigh at all the movement above him.

“At least you didn’t say the wrong name when I touched you.”

“Oh gods, no never! I was very aware who was bringing me pleasure Eskel.”

The Witcher smiled, pride filling his chest. “Good.”

There was a pause and then Jaskiers cheeky voice. “You should touch me more often so I don’t forget your name again.”

Eskel snorted before answering. “I will songbird. At least until you find better company. I understand how lonely the road can get.”

There is a slight change of posture in the way the bard holds himself but Eskel is uncertain if it means anything, unable to clearly read the bard yet, so he continued.

“That is if my touch is welcomed again?”

Jaskier was silent and this time it felt weird, hanging heavily between them. Just as Eskel was to tell him that he would never touch him against his wishes Jaskier spoke up. “It is very welcome. The road does get lonely!”

Jaskier chewed on his lips deep in thought. It was not his fault that he had developed feelings for the other man. How could he have not? Seeing how Eskel treats his animals, how he read with his glasses on, how tenderly he treated him it was only logically that his heart would decide to gift Eskel with its affections.

So Eskel didn’t feel the same, and Jaskier couldn’t even blame him. If the Witcher just wanted to release some stress and use his body he would not complain. As always he would take greedily what he could get until the inevitable end. He tried not to let sadness overwhelm him, but the dark clouds of self-doubt still made their way into his mind.

Apparently he was pretty enough to fuck around with but nothing more. He knew he should refuse, should keep space between them but nobody had ever made him feel so wonderful during sex before.

Eskels hand rapidly moving and his words, his wonderful words in his ears had gifted him with an orgasm stronger than ever before.

“Jaskier? You listening?”

“Oh sorry, I was working on something in my mind. What did you say Esk?”

The Witcher smiled and stopped his stallion. “I said it’s time for a break, Lil´ Bleater is getting restless and I need to stretch my legs as well.”

The bard nodded and slipped of Scorpion after Eskel, eagerly stretching.

“You hungry sweet thing?” Eskel let Bleater down and she and Scorpion immediately grazed trough the wildflowers next to the path.

“Starving!”

They sat down in the warm summer grass, legs stretched out and brushing against each other.

“Jaskier? I…was wondering if you still have some of that massage oil you used on me?”

The bard was in the middle of ripping some jerky apart. Mouth full of beef he looked up. “I don’t? It’s empty. I mean I have other oils…”

“Could I….maybe have the cork from the empty vial?”

Jaskier stared at him for what seemed to last an eternity before reaching into his satchel and retrieving the empty vial. He pulled the cork of and pushed it into Eskels waiting hand.

“Thank you buttercup.”

The Witcher retrieved his glass jar, opened it and let the cork fell inside, without looking at Jaskier.

“Eskel?”

The Witcher hummed and smiled, slightly blushing as the bard climbed into his lap and held him tightly, brushing his hands through his hair.

“I am really glad your hungry Goat tried to eat my book.”

“Me too sweet thing, me too.”


	15. A place to rest my head

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the boys reach an inn

The next few days of travel followed the same pattern. They would get up early, but not as early as other Witchers might and marched on. On even days Jaskier would ride with Eskel on odd days he would allow the stallion a break from his weight and walked in front, lute in hand loudly singing.

Eskel did love both variants equally. Especially after the bard had opened up a bit more and told him more about himself and the meanings of some of his songs. The Witcher had tried to tell interesting stories of his own but unlike the bard, his life could be summarized with. Mother died, Father sold him to Kaer Morhen, been a Witcher since then.

They shared a passion for poetry and every night Jaskier would try to come up with something new. A limerick or a Haiku or some other form of rhyme and Eskel loved it. After dinner, they would push their bedrolls together on the hard ground and Eskel would hold Jaskier through the whole night.

No more “touches” had happened yet but the bard had sought his touch in other ways. After a week together the Witcher couldn’t remember a time when Jaskier hand was not brushing against his thigh, or plucking the hair out of his face, gently brushing over his cheeks and his face smiling at him.

It left him feeling warm yet uneasy, especially if Jaskier touched his face. The bard didn’t seem to mind the scar at all, he was still looking at him as if he wasn’t ugly and Eskel could just not wrap his mind around it.

“Are we there yet?” Jaskier asked for the fifth time in two hours and Eskel smiled down at him. “I can see the chimneys ahead, so about twenty more minutes I would say.”

“Yes! A Town! Oh, Eskel! I cannot wait to perform and dance and sing and oh a bath! We need a bath!”

“Do we?” Eskel dismounted Scorpion, eager to walk the rest of the way with his bard.

“Yes, we do. Because I got plans for you, my dear.” Jaskier winked and while still holding his gaze licked slow, almost lazily, over his lips.

Eskel almost stumbled. “You do?”

Jaskiers laugh was the best thing he had heard all week. “Of course! I told you. I just didn’t want to do anything in the wilderness…at least not for the first time.”

Confused Eskel trotted after the bard, admiring the view of his backside while pondering over the words. He had believed that their arrangement would end as soon as they reached the town, which was why he had slowed down a bit, making the last journey for a day longer than anticipated. He had thought that Jaskier would seek better companionship but it seemed like he was still willing to spend the night with Eskel?

“Come on Esk! No slowing down. We both deserve some hot food and a bath and a warm bed even if it’s just for one night.”

Nodding and smiling Eskel had quickened his pace to catch up with the giddy bard.

The town was much larger than the one before and they quickly found stables for Scorpion and Bleater before making their way to the Inn the stable hand had recommended. To be fair he had recommended it to Jaskier, not looking directly at Eskel, fear sipping out of his pores when the Witcher moved but Jaskier had easily taken over the conversation.

Eskel was very grateful for the help. He wondered again why Geralt had let the bard go. Besides the fact that he was beautiful to look at and a delight he made his life so much easier.

Now they found themselves at a surprisingly pretty inn, with flower baskets at the windows and the delicious smell of Pork Roast coming from the kitchen.

Jaskier grabbed his hand and pulled, eager to spend a day and a half in civilization. The Barkeeper looked up at them, it was early afternoon so the Tavern room wasn’t full. The Lunch crowd had already left but it was too early for the evening haul.

“Good day good man!” Jaskier put on his best charming smile, the man behind the bar grunted in greeting.

“You here for food? Dinners not ready.”

“Ah yes, we would also love a room for the night, and a bath if possible!”

At the prospect of paying costumers, the man’s smile turned friendlier.

“Yeah, we have some rooms left. Two singles or one-“

Jaskier happily interrupted him “One bed will suffice.”

Eskel swallowed hard behind the bard, focusing his gaze onto the inns ceiling.

“One bed sure…and a bath…say is that a lute? You’re a bard by any chance?”

Jaskier beamed. “Well yes, good man! I am the famous troubadour Julian Alfred Pankratz! Better known as Jaskier. At your service!” The innkeeper smiled brightly now.

“Oh, I’ve heard of you! My Louise is a big fan of that Toss a Coin Song!”

He nodded at Eskel while still smiling and continued. “Would you be so kind and play us some tunes tonight?”

“I am sure that can be arranged if you lower your prices a bit?” The large man laughed and nodded in agreement. He handed Jaskier a key. “Second room on the second floor. I will send a bath up right away. Dinner is served at seven.”

“Come on Eskel. Time for a nap.” Jaskier grinned cheekily and pulled the Witcher upstairs with him.


	16. I only have eyes for you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which they get to know each other better

The room was spacious and pretty and Eskel made a mental note to remember this inn for future travels. There was a wooden table in the corner with two chairs where Jaskier put his satchel and started unpacking. A small space divider hid the wooden tub on the other side and the bed was large enough for two people to comfortably sleep in.

Eskel undid his boots as two girls entered the room and started to fill the bathtub. It took them twenty minutes to fill the wooden structure.

“So, your name is Julian?”

Jaskier groaned and dramatically threw his hand to his head. “Yes, it’s a curse. To carry such an uncreative name. But it’s a family tradition I’m afraid.”

Eskel chuckled and watched the girls fill the tub. “How many before you?”

“I’m the Fourth one in my father’s line. His father’s name was also Julian. I guess I got lucky he didn’t name me after himself….Alfred. I only got stuck with it as a middle name.” The bard shrugged and ignored the girls, his complete attention focused on Eskel who could not believe it.

Both the maidens were in there early to mid-twenties and pretty and yet even after they had smiled and winked at Jaskier he hadn’t even looked at them.

“So why change your name to Jaskier?”

“Oh, do you not like Jaskier?”

“I love Jaskier. I am just curious.” Eskel shrugged. The bard blushed and went over to sit next to Eskel, their thighs brushing together.

“Well after I left and denounced my title…”

“Your title!?” A curious expression made its way onto Eskels face.

“My family holds the Viscount seat in Lettenhove. I would have been next in line but I choose to travel as a bard instead. They haven’t officially denounced me yet but it’s been….” He uses his fingers to count, pushing his tongue out the corner of his mouth in concentration and Eskel just wanted to kiss him. “67 years since I’ve been home last. I don’t…my father did not approve of my life choices.”

“We are finished sir,” The two girls interrupted their talk and smiled at Jaskier who nodded in response and waved them off, closing and locking the door behind them.

Eskel smiled and gestured at the steaming bathtub. “Do you want first bath sweet thing?”

Jaskiers whole face lit up like the first Sun after a hard winter and Eskel felt his legs go weak in response. The bard couldn’t remember when he had last been offered to take the first bath. In the twenty years with Geralt he only had it 3 times, the Witcher usually bathing first and only after the water was dirty and almost cold had Jaskier had a chance to clean himself.

The bard stood up from where he was sitting next to Eskel and stood in front of the Witcher, pushing his firm legs open so he could stand between them and resting a hand firmly on Eskels chest. He smiled and leaned in very slowly stopping only a finger with of Eskels lips. His smile turned into a smirk as he whispered. “I had hoped we could maybe enjoy the bath together dear heart.”

 _Oh._ Eskel blinked at the handsome bard in front of him. “Oh.”

Jaskiers face fell. “I understand if you don’t-“

“No, I want!” Eskel grabbed at the hand on his chest and pulled it up to his mouth, placing a tender kiss to Jaskier knuckles. “Please.”

Jaskiers smile immediately came back and he started to slowly unbutton Eskels shirt, grateful that the Witcher had already removed his armour parts when they had entered the room.

“I have some nice bath oils and salts. Do you have a preferred smell?”

“Sandalwood, Elderflowers and parchment paper,” Eskel said without thinking and blushing slightly.

“That’s a very specific combination. How come?”

“Its….it’s how you smell to me little flower.”

Jaskiers eyes widened and he pushed his hand into Eskels hair just at the nape of his neck and softly pulling him forward into a surprisingly soft and chaste kiss.

“Eskel….please undress now and get into the bath so I can ride your cock until the water turns to ice.”

Swallowing hard the Witcher hurried to undress under Jaskiers watchful gaze. The bard took care of his own garments and finally, they stood naked in front of each other.

Smirking Jaskier put his hand on Eskels scarred cheek, gently caressing the uneven skin with his thumb.

“You are allowed to look, Darling. Even encouraged to do so.”

Immediately Eskel let his eyes wander over Jaskiers body. The broad and strong shoulders, the lean muscular arms, the moles on his collarbones and the thick patch of chest hair that thinned out over his stomach down under his navel in a straight line to…

Gods, he had imagined what Jaskiers cock would look like ever since he had had the pleasure of feeling it in his hands but the reality surpassed his daydreams.

“Fuck Jaskier.” He looked up at the bards face before looking back down at the bard’s already hard cock. He wasn’t as thick or wide as Eskels own penis but longer and slightly curved to the left. “You are so beautiful sweet thing.”

He let his eyes wander down to the bard’s strong muscular thighs and legs. “Gods…you are a vision little flower.”

Jaskier blushed at the praise and pulled Eskel to the bathtub. “You are very handsome yourself. No, don’t make that face. I mean it. You are gorgeous Esk.”

The Witcher shrugged and climbed into the tub, Jaskier followed shortly after, immediately climbing into Eskels lap. “Will you allow me to show you? Show you how beautiful you are to me?”

“Jaskier…I…”

“Please Esk, please?”

Unable to refuse the troubadour anything Eskel nodded and leaned back, waiting for whatever the bard had planned for him.


	17. Wash my sins away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which they take a bath
> 
> [SMUT ahead]

Jaskiers bright smile was all-consuming to Eskel as he leaned back into the tub. The rising heat had put a beautiful sheer of sweat on Jaskiers flush skin and he wanted to reach out and touch but the bard had other plans.

“Do you trust me to take care of you?” Jaskiers voice sounded breathy and all that Eskel could do was to nod in response.

“Put your arms up onto the brim and keep them there.”

Eskels arms went up before Jaskier had even finished the sentence and the bard pushed his hands through Eskels loose hair, pushing it out of his face and kissed him deeply before letting his mouth wander over the rest of his face, pressing gentle kisses to his brows, his nose, his cheekbones and his scars without ever losing his warm smile.

It was almost too much for Eskel and he had to close his eyes when Jaskier whispered against his ear.

“You are so beautiful, so strong. I love your arms.” Jaskiers hands made their way from his head to his shoulders and down the length of his arms.

“Your fingers feel so perfect on my skin.”

Gentle kisses were pressed against all of his fingers.

Jaskiers hands came back up to his shoulders and carefully scratched over his chest.

“Your chest hair makes me wild Eskel. Every time I catch a glimpse of it I want to rip your shirt open and run my hands' trough.” An involuntary smile made its way onto Eskels lips as Jaskier continued.

He could feel the bard shuffle closer and a face being pressed into the crook of his neck.

“And your smell. Now my dear heart I don’t have Witcher senses but gods your smell.” The sound of a large inhale rung in the Witchers ears and then he could feel a hot wet tongue licking his neck and teeth gently nibbling at his skin.

“I want to taste every inch of you. I want to devour you whole.”

Eskel made a sound that could only be described as a whine, lowly vibrating through his chest, and his hands clutched the wooden rim of the tub so hard that his knuckles turned white from the pressure. Jaskiers mouth was still pressed against his neck, his teeth grazed further down to his right collarbone, nibbling and licking.

“Songbird…I….”

“Shhh, let me take care of you, my dear.”

Eskel wasn’t used to such treatments, he had never just been passive and he had a hard time staying still but he wanted to please the bard so much he didn’t dare to move. He heard himself slightly moan when Jaskier mouth found the scar on his chest and kissed and licked at him until he was shivering.

A clever hand found his nipple and rubbed and twisted until he pushed his hips up, his erection aching, needy for some friction against his hot skin.

“Please sweet thing. Please touch me.”

“Oh but I am touching you Eskel.” Jaskier snickered but let his hands traverse down, over the Witchers abdomen, applying the perfect amount of pressure.

His mouth came back to Eskels chest, lovingly teasing one of his nipples while his hands made their way down to the Witchers legs, spread them wide open and pushing between them.

“Jaskier….sweet thing.”

“I got you big guy.” Jaskiers head came up as he wrapped his legs around Eskels broad waist. “Keep me raised up please.”

Immediately Eskel moved his hands and kneaded them greedily into Jaskiers butt cheeks, spreading him open. They both moaned and Jaskier reached over Eskel for a small bottle of oil.

“Don’t drop me, dear heart.”

“Never buttercup.”

Smiling Jaskier opened the little vial with his mouth, spitting the cork to the side and coating his fingers with the thick oil.

“Lift me up Esk.”

A soft whimper left Eskels mouth as he complied, lifting the bard like he weighed nothing, high above the water, so that his thick cock was almost at Eskels eye line.

“Gods, fuck you are so strong. That’s so fucking hot.”

He rested his legs on Eskels shoulders as he reached around to work himself open. Overwhelmed Eskel wasn’t sure where to look. On one hand, he wanted to see Jaskiers long fingers vanishing in his quivering hole on the other hand Jaskiers cock was only a head tilt away.

He moved his head until he could breathe against the crown of Jaskiers prick. “Please? Little flower, may I?”

“Fuck yes Eskel, dear heart! Please.”

Jaskier was already two fingers in, pushing and twisting when Eskels mouth enveloped him completely and he could all but moan the Witchers name. The Witcher moaned around Jaskiers cock, twirling his tongue around the hard flesh and pulling Jaskier closer to his face.

The bard’s legs started to shake but he trusted Eskel to hold him up safely, while he pushed another finger in his hole and spread himself open. The double sensation of being full and having Eskels hot mouth around him, sucking and licking, was almost too much and he needed to pause or he would have come right away.

The need to praise his Witcher was still there but Jaskier was far beyond forming coherent words, so he stuck to moans and whimpers until he finally felt ready.

“Eskel dear, please…now…need your cock.”

With an obscene slurp, the Witcher let Jaskier cock sprang free and slowly let Jaskier drop back down into his lap. He hissed as the troubadour reached for his hard prick and guided him inside his hole.

“Gods Eskel…that’s….oh…you stretching me so good.”

Eskel pushed his hips up experimentally and smiled when Jaskier threw his head back in pleasure, his arms tightly wrapped around the Witchers neck and the moved as one. They found a rhythm that suited them both, easy and lazily as if they had been doing this for years.

Eskels hand still held the bard at his butt cheeks, moving him up and down his cock with ease while pressing soft kisses onto Jaskiers face.

Jaskier was trembling in his arms, covered in sweat and rubbing his face against his neck. “It feels so good Esk, so good…I wanna do this every day with you.”

“Yes, gods’ songbird. My sweet thing. Whatever you want. Whatever makes you happy. Just….I’m so close.”

“Eskel!” Jaskier clawed his fingernails into Eskels back, scratching and panting heavily against him. “Yes. Esk. Come in me. Fill me up! Please!”

There was no power in the world that could have stopped Eskel from coming right at that moment when Jaskiers words washed over him. “Jaskier!” He held the bard up with one hand and brought the other one between them, wrapping his fist around Jaskiers leaking prick and tugged twice, while biting hard into the bard’s neck, marking him as his.

Screaming in pleasure Jaskier could fill the hot ribbons of seed splashing all over his and Eskels chest before he slowly came down from his high, resting his head against the Witchers shoulder.

Happily smiling Jaskier pushed his head up, capturing Eskels lips in a soft and tender kiss.

Eskel was at loss for words but he needed Jaskier to know how he felt. How wonderful it had been but when he opened his mouth no words came out. Thankfully Jaskier seemed to understand without words.

“Now my dearest Witcher. I would love nothing more than to dry up and rest in bed with you for the rest of the day but I have to get ready for my performance tonight.

His stomach gave off a low rumble.

“And eat Dinner.” Jaskier laughed and slowly eased himself of Eskel.

“Jask….”

“Uh no. None of that. Don’t make that…” He gestured at Eskels face. “That self-hating face. I swear whoever raised you Witchers needs a kick in the balls. I assume they have balls yes?”

Eskel laughed and helped the bard out of the tub.

“He does. I just wanted to thank you. I’ve never…. It was….thank you.”

Jaskier paused drying himself and leaned over to kiss Eskel again.

“You can thank me later after I sang your praises. Now get dressed so we can have dinner. I’m starving.”


	18. The Ballad of Eskel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there is singing

Eskel had made his way down to the Tavern shortly after Jaskier who was already waiting for him at a dark corner table with food and Ale.

He sat with his back to the wall and smiled happily when Jaskier pushed way closer than necessary. Their legs brushed together while they were eating and he loved every minute of it.

The food was good and plenty and Eskel made another mental note to let Lambert and his partner Aiden know about this special inn.

After dinner Jaskier stood up, stretching and grabbing his lute. He turned to Eskel and smiled almost shyly.

“Will you….I was wondering if you….” The bard swallowed hard and the Witcher waited for him to continue. “I was wondering if you might watch me play a song or two?”

“Sweet thing. I’ll stay for the whole set.”

Jaskier beamed at him and leaned over to kiss him, before making his way to the middle of the well-filled room. Eskel wasn’t sure what song the bard sang first to busy staring and wondering. Jaskier had just kissed him in public, with ease. He smiled and raised his hand to his lips before focusing on the bard once more.

Jaskier smiled at him, warm and full of…something and Eskel knew. He knew he would do anything in his power to keep the bard at his side and not just in his bed. He wanted to make Jaskier laugh, made sure he was safe and taken care of. He wanted to provide for him and share his life with him.

Weirdly enough the Witcher didn’t freak out when the realization that he had fallen in love hit him. Instead, he just smiled into his Ale, humming along at Jaskiers song, enjoying the happy look on his bard's face.

The uneasiness he had felt before fell slowly away every time Jaskiers eyes landed on him the bard smiled softly and Eskels heart skipped a beat.

Maybe he could ask him to winter with him at Kaer Morhen after he took him to the coast. He knew the trip was somehow important to Jaskier so he would make sure the bard could dig his toes into the warm ocean sand soon.

After about ninety minutes Jaskier took a break and sauntered over to him, plopping down right into his lap and taking a sip from Eskels mug.

“Hey….”

“Hey.” The Witcher smiled and pressed a soft kiss against Jaskiers lips who in return wrapped his arms around him.

“Do you like my singing Esk?”

Nodding the Witcher tightened his arms around the bard. “Yes, sweet thing. Your voice is wonderful. Prettiest thing I’ve ever heard.”

Confused Eskel watched as the beginning of tears started to shimmer in his bard's eyes but before he could say something small kisses were pressed all over his face.

“Oh, you wonderful man. I…I am so glad I have you….I do right? Have you?”

Nodding Eskel took in the hopeful smile on Jaskiers face.

“Yes, sweet thing. You have me. For as long as you want me.”

“Ah….forever then.”

Eskel blushed and Jaskier got back up again to finish his singing.

The bard played for another hour before he bowed. “Now my dearest listeners! You have the honour, nay the privilege to hear me perform a new song! It is called the Ballad of Eskel.” He paused for a moment before smirking. “Which is ironic because it’s not a ballad.”

The crowd laughed and waited eagerly for Jaskier to start.

Eskel felt his stomach tightened, he could not take his gaze from the bard as he listened.

If possible he felt even more in love with the bard while he listened to his song.

Nobody had ever done something like this for him and there was so much feeling in Jaskier voice that he knew he wasn’t the only one in love. That the bard cared for him too and he smiled freely for the first time in forever while in public, not caring to hide his scars. Not caring if people would stare. All that mattered was the bard before him. He chipped a piece of the wooden mug away to put in his Jar later and smiled to himself.

Jaskier finished his song and collected the coin that people had put on the table before him. He had made a nice sum but for now, it didn’t matter to him. All he wanted was to see Eskels reaction but he was afraid to look at the Witcher, afraid his affections would be rejected but when he looked up all he could see in Eskels Amber Eyes was love.

“Upstairs. Now.”

Laughing Jaskier nodded and let himself be led to their room.


	19. A Jar full of Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which confessions are made

Hours later when the sun had already set they laid together, curled up. Jaskier was on his back and Eskel laid between his open legs, tired but satisfied and almost purring as Jaskier played with his hair.

He knew he needed to ask, still afraid of the answer but hopeful.

“Jask?”

“Hmmm?” came the lazy response and Eskel sighed. Maybe he should wait until the morning to ask. No, he needed to get it out now, before courage would leave him again.

“I was...wondering….hoping…I mean you are in no way obligated. I understand if you don’t want to…. I guess because of Geralt but….I….you are in my heart little flower and I don’t want to be separated from you ever again and I had hoped…I mean you have probably better plans already, right? Like, go to Oxenfurt? Or a court. I understand if you rather we met up again in spring…or…not at all? I just…. I…”

“Eskel?” Jaskier sat up and pulled the Witcher with him, softly kissing him. “Are you asking me to winter with you at Kaer Morhen? Because if that’s the case I would love nothing more than to do so. But if I’m misreading this…”

“No! I mean yes! You will come? With me? As mine?”

Jaskier smiled and rubbed his nose against Eskels. “Yes…yours….” He took the Witchers hand and laced their fingers together. “Esk? I love you….”

Eskels face journeyed through so many emotions that to an outsider it would have looked almost comical. First, there was doubt and confusion written on his face. Then his expression turned hopeful and finally it settled on a bright happy smile and he pushed Jaskier back down onto the bed. “I love you too, songbird.”

“Oh….that’s great.”

“That’s great? That’s all you have to say little flower?” Eskel laughed against his partner's lips.

“Well I would show you how I feel about it my dear heart but you wore me out.”

Laughing Eskel pulled him closer. “So you will winter with me?”

“Yes of course. I just got you, I would not want to part so soon.”

The Witcher smiled happily before remembering a crucial detail.

“What about Geralt?”

Jaskier was silent for a while, carefully arranging his thoughts.

“It will probably be a bit awkward at first but I don’t care. I mean he just has to deal with it. With us. It’s not his business anyway right?”

“No, its not….I just don’t want to see you hurt.”

There was another pause. “I won’t pretend that it won’t hurt me maybe a bit but I will be fine. I have you, my love.”

“Yes, you do little flower. Now sleep, we have an early morning ahead of us. So I can take you to the coast.”

“Yes!” Laughing Eskel pulled the blankets up and kissed his lovers forehead and watched as the bard drifted off into a peaceful slumber.

* * *

The next weeks of their journey felt like a dream to Eskel and he regularly pinched himself to make sure that he was indeed awake and the bard indeed loved him. Every time he looked up to search for Jaskiers face he was met with the bard’s brilliant smile.

He could already smell the ocean salt in the air and he knew that they would reach the coast soon. Jaskier was eager, smiling and laughing and singing all the way through their travels. If they could not ride together to give Scorpion a break, they would walk next to each other, their fingers laced together and sometimes Jaskier would rest his head against Eskels shoulder.

The Witcher loved every second of it and he promised himself to make Jaskier happy for every day for the rest of their life. They had to stop a few days after a fight with a Basilisk so that Eskel could regain his strength and Jaskier had tended to his wounds with so much expertise and care it was almost overwhelming.

“We should reach the ocean tomorrow sweet thing.”

Jaskier nodded eagerly as he prepared the campsite for them, Eskel still brushing Scorpion down and Lil´ Bleater happily running around in the forest clearing. After he finished taking care of his horse Eskel set down against a tree on their bedrolls and waited for Jaskier to finish building the fire. He plucked a small yellow buttercup from the grass and put it in his Glass Jar. Over the last month, it had become surprisingly full and the smile on Jaskiers face, every time the bard saw him put something in the jar was breathtaking.

“Hey.”

Eskel looked up at his smiling partners face.

“Hey.”

Jaskier softly kicked his feet apart so he could sit between them, his back resting again Eskels chest.

“I’ve been thinking….”

Eskel chuckled against the other man’s neck. “Did it hurt songbird?”

“Pff…haha very funny.”

Eskel wrapped his arms around his lover holding him close.

“I….” Jaskier took a deep breath, staring out in the clearing, working hard to press the words out.

“I want to marry you.”

Eskel went still behind him. Not moving, barely breathing.

There was silence for a long time before Jaskier nervously laughed.

“Shit…forget I said anything. I don’t need…I….never mind.”

He was about to get up when Eskel pressed him back against his chest, a warm hand grabbed his chin and his head was turned around and a deep kiss pressed against his lips.

“Songbird. Sweet thing. I love you so much.” Eskels golden eyes shimmered in the evening light and Jaskier swallowed hard.

“But you don’t want to marry me…It…It is okay Eskel. I know it’s soon we don’t have to.”

“Of course I want to marry you, songbird. There is nothing that would make me happier. I just….are you sure you want to tie yourself to a Witcher?”

Jaskier leaned forward and bit into Eskels nose.

“Ou! What was that for?”

“For asking stupid questions! I don’t give a fuck about you being a Witcher! I love you! I want to spend my life with you!”

“I love you too, songbird. I…I don’t have a ring or-“

“I don’t need that. I just need your heart.”

Eskel pulled the bard around so he was straddling his lap and brushed the hair out of his face.

“You have it, Julian.”

“So you’ll marry me?”

Laughing Eskel kisses his lover.

“Yes. I will marry you.”

Squealing with joy Jaskier through his arms around Eskel and rubbed his face against the crook of his neck. The Witcher joined in the bright laughter his heart and Jar full with Love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for this amazing ride we took together! Every comment made me so happy!   
> I am sad to see this fic go;)


	20. Preview

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooooooon


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